Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip, but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves were sick and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular elves do.
Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two other ones had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where to.
More stress!
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the ski boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys everywhere.
Totally frustrated, Santa went back into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whisky. When he went to the cupboard, he found the elves had hit the booze and there was nothing to drink.
In his frustration, he dropped the coffee cup and it broke into hundreds of pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw that it was made from.
Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a cute little angel with a great big Christmas tree.
The angel said: "Where would you like to put this tree, fat man?"
And that my friend is how the little angel came to be on top of the Christmas tree ! ! !
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Monday, November 3, 2008
What Makes A Malaysian A Malaysian
1. You can name all the players from the the English Premier League, but ask you to name one football player from Malaysia and you can't.
2. When StreamyX Broadband was launched, you complained that StreamyX was too slow. When Maxis Broadband was launched, you complained that Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax was launched, you complained that Wimax was too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX is still the best.
3. When the toll prices increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go to Starbucks and pay RM10 for a cup of coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.
4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall, find out that there's a SALE, run from one end of the huge 1Utama shopping mall, NO COMPLAINTS.
5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.
6. You have a parent who forces you into the science stream in high school, study engineering in the University, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and focus on commerce.
7. You know someone who can specially develop a Caucasian accent just by speaking to a Caucasian.
8. You complain against the government the coffee shop and you talk very loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs and you also talk very loud. Attend a political rally by the Opposition Party and you shout very loud. Then when Opposition organises a protest and asks you to attendgo, you are silent. Scared that they might detain you under the ISA (Internal Security Act).
9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people queueing up at the last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.
10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.
11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.
12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.
13. When a White Man kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you are very happy. When a Malaysian guy kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him.
Boy is it great to be a Malaysian.
2. When StreamyX Broadband was launched, you complained that StreamyX was too slow. When Maxis Broadband was launched, you complained that Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax was launched, you complained that Wimax was too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX is still the best.
3. When the toll prices increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go to Starbucks and pay RM10 for a cup of coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.
4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall, find out that there's a SALE, run from one end of the huge 1Utama shopping mall, NO COMPLAINTS.
5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.
6. You have a parent who forces you into the science stream in high school, study engineering in the University, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and focus on commerce.
7. You know someone who can specially develop a Caucasian accent just by speaking to a Caucasian.
8. You complain against the government the coffee shop and you talk very loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs and you also talk very loud. Attend a political rally by the Opposition Party and you shout very loud. Then when Opposition organises a protest and asks you to attendgo, you are silent. Scared that they might detain you under the ISA (Internal Security Act).
9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people queueing up at the last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.
10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.
11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.
12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.
13. When a White Man kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you are very happy. When a Malaysian guy kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him.
Boy is it great to be a Malaysian.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Ghosts, Ghouls and Goblins - Malaysian Style
Are you looking for a unique theme this Halloween? Why not try something Malaysian? This scary lens introduces you to Malaysian Ghosts and Ghouls.
read more | digg story
read more | digg story
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
The Complete Guide To Hemorrhoids Home Remedies
This is one of the best and most complete guides on hemorrhoids home remedies and other treatment for hemorrhoids.
read more | digg story
read more | digg story
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Nail Fungus Home Remedies Guide
In these series, you’ll learn proper nail fungus home remedies that you could try.
read more | digg story
read more | digg story
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Nail Fungus Home Remedies Guide Part 1
The key to proper treatment of any illness or infection is first to understand the infection before deciding on the treatment to undertake.
read more | digg story
read more | digg story
Monday, September 22, 2008
Nail Fungus Home Remedies Series Part 1
This guide provides nail fungus home remedies and solutions for treatment of nail fungus.
read more | digg story
read more | digg story
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